Wet The Bed – Chris Brown

I apologize that there is no official music video for this song but I have to play it, in honor my Thursday nights. Thursday is my big night. Go big or go home. Or go big and come home… which is what sometimes happens as well. I am usually a wreck by this time of night on Thursday’s however I am going to take it easy tonight because I have been ill as of late. I got a nasty cough and some nasal congestion and have pumping Nyquil into my system like a fiend (well the CVS brand because I’m cheap). So instead I’m going to sit at home, drink some Bailey’s, pack a lip and watch the Bruins dismantle the Habs tonight. But if it weren’t for Thursday nights then I would have never discovered this song, nor had the story to go along with it.

So it’s a typical Thursday day in the life of Calamity. I start drinking pretty early with the friends and neighbors, go out to celebrate a friends birthday, then hit the bar which is always hopping on Thursday. This is the place where I usually pull my tail in. It’s not really anything to brag about because I almost always go for the girls that drip with desperation. The girls I do bring home, I often don’t see them in the daylight anyways, because they take off in the early hours of the morning. Sometimes they do stay, and I have to bring them home the next morning… which is actually worse. Anyways, those are stories for another time and another day.

So I end up bringing this girl home last Thursday. We do our thing, then go to bed. In the middle of the night I wake up to her gathering her things and I leave. Whatever, like I said, I almost prefer this. A few hours later I roll over and rest my arm across the spot she was sleeping… and its wet. Instantly I shoot up and think to myself, “what the fuck? Was I drinking in bed last night or something?” I look around for an empty beer can, but see nothing… so I smell the wet spot. And it smells like urine. This chick pissed my bed and bounced.

I decide to get up and head to my class and deal with this mess later. On my way out I naturally tell all my friends, roommates, and girls they brought back the story. I head to class and try and focus on my school work. Actually, that’s a lie, I got high first instead, so I had zero focus. But I come back to my room and there are dozens of pictures of girls pissing in public plastered on my wall. My roommate posts this song on my facebook wall and a memory is made. Now I have shared that memory with you.

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~ by Shutout on April 14, 2011.

One Response to “Wet The Bed – Chris Brown”

  1. Unusual lady to say the least. Remember that old, weird Michael Landon movie about bed-wetting called The Loneliest Runner? We seem to have the same odd sense of humor!

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